Someone asked me a while ago if I had any regrets and I spontaneously answered, "no." They looked at me and said 'good for you.' I thought about it afterwards and realized how full of shit I was. I hate having regrets and I try not to focus on them but some days they sit in the back of my mind like that sullen teenager at the back of class. I know how pointless it is to think about what might have been, its not like you can go into a time machine and have a do over. I just have days where I do regret the choices I made and I wonder what trajectory my life would be on now if I had made different choices.
I have about five major regrets in my life. I regret that I never pursued the journalism degree I had thought about pursuing. I regret not being braver about acknowledging my sexuality at a younger age. My other regrets are too personal to share. Today that sullen teenager is lurking at the back of my mind and saying to me, 'what if?' There is nothing I can say back except 'it is what it is,' and carry on. Such is the nature of regret.